Thursday, July 30, 2009

Days like this

It's funny how you can really get used to a place. Be it a spot on the globe, an emotional place, a state of mind, or the health of your body. I've had to do a lot of changing in the past 9 months... in all of those areas.

Place of residence: I would have never imagined I would ever get used to 113 degree days. If you had told me even a year ago that I would move to Vegas I would have laughed at you and said I was also planning on moving to Mars... But now, rain shocks me. I'm so used to the dryness that when it rains I get excited and nervous, all at the same time.

My emotional state: I can safely say that I am (or, was) pretty even keeled when it comes to my emotions. Not one to cry a whole lot. And I rarely have large mood swings. That all changed with the pregnancy, moving, and living by myself in a new place for 4 months... Now I have very strong urges to cry and then to laugh. To get angry and then excited. It's weird.

My state of mind: That has definitely changed. My "life plan" was to go to college, get my nursing degree, and work. A husband wasn't worked into the "plan". Nor was moving, getting pregnant, buying a dog, and postponing my college dreams. Hmmm. Obviously my "plan" wasn't God's plan. I've had to change my state of mind to reflect a spirit of waiting on the Lord, rather than planning for the Lord.

My body: Before I got pregnant I was a whopping 86lbs. Yeah. The size of a twelve year old. And as much as I tried I couldn't gain more than 3lbs. I was unhealthily skinny, and I didn't want to be. Fast forward to July 30, 2009. I am now 116lbs!! 30lbs!! And I'm still gaining! I would have never imagined I would ever see my scale go up. In fact, that was a fear when I found out that I was pregnant. Would I be able to gain the weight needed for a healthy baby? Please know that I tried everything in my power to gain weight before. I was having milkshakes all the time, drinking boosts with most meals, even on a feeding tube for 2 months. This is a miracle for me! I have never been healthier than I am right now. And it's all been because of the Lord.

Through all of these changes the Lord has remained constant. He's never abandoned me. He was never "surprised" by any of this.

He's been preparing me for all of these changes for years! He knew that I would have to be independent and hard-headed enough to take care of my household and family by myself. He knew I would have to be adventurous enough to move across the country. He knew my pride would be worked on time and time again as I submit not only to my awesome husband but to the plans He had for me.

To be completely honest, it has taken me months to be thankful for my daughter. To be thankful for being a mom. I REALLY struggled when I found out that I was pregnant.

How can God do this to me? Doesn't He know I'm supposed to be a nurse? What is He thinking? I'm not ready for this!

Honestly, who is ever really ready to become a parent. Even the most prepared person isn't ready when that little one pops out helpless and in desperate need of care, love, and nurturing.

So by the grace of God He is growing me into a mom. I can confidently say that I look forward to the day I meet our little one and all the days that follow and all the children that follow.

But for now, I'm waiting, preparing, and being thankful. Thanking the Lord for days like this when He reminds me of how much He loves me. Preparing for the days to come of sleepless nights, loads of laundry, and feeding 3 mouths. And I'm waiting to see what else the Lord has up His sleeve for me...

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

It's officially official

I am having a baby.

Just thought you should know.

What makes it official? The following:

There is a crib in our guest bedroom
I just folded 2 loads of baby doll clothes
In trying to prepare for the baby I've completely run a blank on nursery songs
My emotions go from super excited to freakin' scared out of my mind
I feel like I'm as big as a house
And... I just ordered cloth diapers in preparation.

Yup. This is really happening.

32 weeks 3 days done
53 days left.

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

An update

It's been too long since I've written a detailed post. A lot has happened over the course of 3 weeks. Because I don't have the patience to write a whole lot right now (I'm getting tireder as the weeks roll on - I know tireder is not a word...) I'll list what's been happenin'.

Gracie came in to town! We had a really good time. It was wonderful to see the Lord work on our relationship, as we tried not to drive each other crazy. :) We had a few days of shopping, went "downtown" for a magic show (Gracie was called up to help!) at the ancient Tropicana, and then off to the Belagio for gelato (yum!). We then stood in line so Gracie could ride the roller coaster at NY NY, but I got really sick so we had to go home. We were able to get some pottery painted. Gracie's "Sun and stars" bowl turned out beautifully! I painted a pig. Oink! Oink!


Half way through Gracie's trip we got a call that my mom's mom, Nannie, had passed away Wednesday morning (6/24) so Gracie had to cut her trip short. We left for VA on Thursday the 25th.

The viewing and funeral went well. It was sad to say goodbye to my Nan but it was good to know she wasn't suffering through chemo anymore.

As it goes with most of my birthdays, something not-so-good happens. This year I buried my grandmother... thankfully the Lord has given me a sense of humor, so I can see the comedy known as my birthday.



Though the circumstances for me coming into town were sad, I certainly enjoyed myself while I was there. I stayed most nights with my grandparents 'cause Jimmy had mono... Sorry, Jim. I got to see good friends, and I had lots of time to spend with my family. I needed this time to get away and relax.


When I got home I was greeted by my exceedingly awesome and handsome husband! I love him so much! He makes my days so much brighter. We had a wonderful time relaxing, hanging out, and enjoying just being together. We don't get much time to do that.


An Otto update: While Michael was here Otto's 3rd eye popped out - known as a Cherry Eye. It was pretty ugly. Our vet gave us steroid eye drops to reduce the swelling, but that didn't work. We were told he would need some surgery costing around $600! I did a little research and was able to get the surgery done for just over $100... The Lord really provided! Otto now has a cone on his head to protect his eye from him scratching it, but other than that he looks great!

As for me, I'm doing well. My last baby checkup went well, I'm right on schedule. Baby Girl is doing wonderfully! She moves pretty much all the time and has started stretching off of my ribs. It hurts pretty bad... The doctor found that I'm a little anemic, so I'm on iron supplements possibly till the end of the pregnancy.

10 weeks to go! Yipee! I'm looking forward to meeting this little mover. We ordered the crib - Thanks, Nina and Pepa (my mom's and dad's "grandparent names") :)


And finally, I'm in the final countdown till Michael gets home from Albuquerque. Finally! He should be back by the end of next week (not this weekend). I really do miss him, but I'm also aware of the transition period we'll be going through soon as we relearn how to live together. ;) Be praying for us!


That's about it. I'll be posting my 7 1/2 month picture soon. Patience!

Wednesday, July 8, 2009

The death of an empty space

Before: A plain large wall...
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Now: Tada! I've got a turquoise blue chalk board and mirrors! I've been wanting to get this chalk board for a while, and I was able to get it for my birthday thanks to Grandma LaMarca!

Sunday, July 5, 2009

Hold your horses!

I'll get an update out soon! A lot has happened over the past 3 or so weeks. Good and bad. Happy and sad.

But right now...


I'm spending time with my man!!!


So ya'll will just have to wait...
For I am in a time of life when things change around me. Everything I own or think I have control over I must lay before my Father's feet: my education, my body, my place of residence, my husband, my children.